“That’s the sort of beauty you appreciate, then?”
“Yes, it is…”
“You mean, just that sort of beauty?”
“Just that sort”
“Why?”
“In that face…there is so much suffering”
Beat.
“But perhaps you are talking nonsense.”
“And what would make you think so?”
“It is only a witty word to use, suffering. Who appreciates it?...and more importantly, who wants it?”
“I do”
“Then I must say that you are only but an idiot”
“If embracing the noblest of all truths is idiocy, then for sure I am nothing but what you call me, and trust me, I would not like it if you call me by any other name.”
“You only use fancy words, but I don’t fancy them.”
“I never did make up any words about this thing, to mislead you. I only quote the words of Buddha when I say that suffering is nothing but the noblest of all truths. When I say that those who deny this truth are only but insolent fools, I must admit, I do use some of my own words.”
“Hmm..But I am sure Buddha never believed we must dwell in this suffering. Buddha has only always shown the way beyond suffering, towards peace and contentment and moral transience of the soul.”
“True. But before you tread the path that leads beyond suffering, you must accept the suffering, you must embrace it and you must learn to be at peace with it. Before you kill a beast, or tame it, you have to be at peace with the fact that there stands in front of you, a dangerous creature, which can rip you apart, the very moment you let it get a whiff that it can; closing your eyes to the beast, and pretending that it is not there, that it only exists in an imagined figment of your consciousness, is not only cowardice, but the most foolish of all actions a being can perform in his/her lifetime.”
“I understand and I fully agree. So in this case, I see that you do accept and appreciate the suffering that every person has to go through, and live with. But you also do accept that it is not the end all of our existence, it is only a step that leads to a broader and more significant path towards happiness and contentment, which is where to, the enlightened one (Buddha) also leads us..for you will have suffering, it is unavoidable, but it will be absurd to seek it, and that is what you seem to be doing by confessing your love for her; if it is the suffering in her that intrigues you, then you cannot possibly make it your purpose, because the purpose of all our lives is happiness..”
“I don’t even believe that our lives have a purpose, leave alone agreeing to it that the purpose is happiness. There is no reason to believe that we all are born for a reason.”
“Buddha shows us the middle path, and he will have us convinced that at the end of this path is the pot of gold we have all been born for, the answer to all questions, the blissful state of being. For that is what he would have us believe is the purpose of our existence”
“I do not agree with what he says, and I will need…”
“Ha! There you go, you wicked soul, churning yourself in your own contradictions, I know the likes of you”
“No, you don’t. Because the kind of people you know read their books and listen to their sermons and make it their ‘laws of the land’. I, for your kind information, am a free soul. Buddha is not my god. He was one amongst us tragically ignorant humans, the only difference being he was a free soul. And he had no gods. He learnt a lot in his life, more than most of us can even imagine thinking about. And I have all the respect in the world for him. And I believe his soul will rest in peace if we more than mincing his words, choose to be our own light, and follow it.”
“But aren’t you, my friend, the same free soul who was ‘mincing’ words in front of me, a moment ago? You belong to the kind who are always looking for a smart thing to say in every situation, whether or not they even know at all what they are saying or what it means. You are the one who reads the ‘quote of the day’ in the morning newspaper and then spends his day looking for the right moment to use it. I am pretty sure, there is nothing but the basest of motives in your ‘affection’ for her, and I don’t care what fancy words you use to adorn and hide it, as long as you do not blasphemise the likes of Buddha.”
“You misunderstand me.. when..”
“Like always? You just think everyone misunderstands you, don’t you? You think I am foolish because I don’t “understand” what you are “trying” to say, and so is everyone else and most people in the world because they fail to see the genius that you are. You are one of the greatest philosophers my friend and I don’t mean it at all. And you have got me thinking here, about your thoughts you have just blessed me with. And I need to ponder upon it with a snigger. Will you be gracious enough to allow me to be alone and to do the same?”
“And will you be gracious enough to give me a moment and a breath and allow me to wrest my answers to the questions you pose. I agree with most of what you have just said, but I don’t find your way of going about your arguments agreeable. An argument is supposed to have two people arguing, sometimes even more, although two is the most fruitful. But all you want to do in all arguments is say what you wish to say and end it all…”
“Oh..come on..you cant..”
“Will you please let me say all now that I wish to? I, unlike you, have smooth edges around my head. I, unlike you, have ears and eyes that want to hear and see new things. I, unlike you, have a fetish for suffering. And I, unlike you, have respect for opinions and thoughts that do not necessarily walk hand in hand with mine. Let me clarify my stance by saying that I revere Buddha, and do not follow him. Let me make myself clear when I say that I won’t let you judge my affection for her. And let me leave you alone here now, for I have things to figure out. Will you please pass the photograph?”
“You are being an ass..”
“I don’t mind being that, and let it be for some other time for me to tell you why. Good night.”
“And at that some other time, I will let you know what really makes you a pain to live with. Let the J move around before you go.”
“Let me drag a few more breaths”
“Sure..”
Beat.
“Good night, sleep tight and do not let the bugs bite”
“Ha!”
