whats keepin me busy??

what would the child u were,
think of the adult u have become??

trees, buildings, eagles, airplanes and cars...

dark... dark. darkness. i love this because i can see nothing, because i dont know where i am and most important of all, neither does anyone else. i try very hard to open my eyes. it seems to be harder than usual. i persist. oh..i am scared now because i cant see anything. i close my eyes back hard and try again. green. i can see some green. aaah..that is not so abominable, infact it seems like a pretty good place. now, where is it???.. i begin to draw that this must not be that frequented a place. it doesnt seem like. now let me see what is up with me. i have a look down on me, i look perfect, all in one piece, but the head, oh..it hurts. it dawns on me that the tope must still be there..i have a fag in my hand. i am not feeling that good now. i throw it down on the ground and step on it hard. hard enough for my leg to hurt..i go back to the green. green is so good, so selfless, so like a true friend. the friend u could just spend hours with without speaking a word. just sit in the shade of green and gaze up into the sky, at those eagles flying so high up in the sky and wonder how scarily high would that be, wonder about all that you could see, if you could be there. where eagles dare. hehe..i am smiling now. my gaze wanders a little higher up. this is not that pleasant. concrete sprouts out from behind the green. hard, sordid, lifeless, boring. it stands there stout and proud, forever. how i like it not. how i wish it would come down and crash on the ground,.. but ironically on the same hand, how i need it to take shelter, how it is the friend i wouldnt care about normally but run to when i am faced with rain, or heat?? i cringe quitely, embarassed of my hypocrisy when suddenly a voice jolts me. its a familiar voice, a friend of mine. ' is baar minors mein toh fat legi yaar hamaari'. silence. more silence. amusement begins to brew inside me. i can hardly stop myself from laughing at the stark contrast in my state and the statement. strangest of things amuse me. prophetic. i suddenly find myself pondering over how incisive the statement is, how inclusive of all our states of mind, holding to its bosom all the littleness of our being. i shake myself up from the dreary thought, try to divert myself, and look for my eagles in the sky. there is an airplane over my head. strangely it has its lights on, even at this hour of the day. maybe its trying too hard to make sure its on the right path. or maybe it is actually dark up there. who knows but them. those high up in the sky...gliding over all the pettiness that lies below them. i look up to them and wave. they look down on me and smile. i try to imagine what they can see of me and whether it must actually be lonely up there. a few seconds, and the airplane is out of sight again. it wouldnt stop for me. whether i want it to or not is a different matter altogether. for some other time. i come back to the ground. aaaaahhhfff. grotesque, ugly, monstrous. i let out a light shriek of horror. my friend enquires what the matter is. its nothing i say. nothing. its just a row of cars parked right in front of my face. i am horrified when i see these metallic creatures running helter and skelter trying to pretend they are headed somewhere but are not. they are just pretending. they are cool. they are in. but god!!! they are metal. hard cocoon, immmaculately plush, uninitiated to the fresh air and sun. unknown to the pleasure of the naked feet on green grass. i feel sorry for them and scared of them. i am feeling very uneasy now. i want to stand up and run away to my greens. as hard as i try to move, i realise i cannot. i am stuck to the place. i look at my leg and find it there hard pressed right where i left it. i try, i try again and get tired of trying. i lay on my back and try to find my eagles. they are gone leaving behind an empty sky. i am doomed. i give up. all i have left to me now are the cars...